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An Excuse for Giving Love

We received this beautiful and inspiring story on unconditional love from our friend and reader Eric Theeman from Auckland New Zealand, the City of Sails. Thank you, Eric!

One day, at a festival, a polarity Therapist got me to hold the top and bottom of someone’s spine. I felt quite silly, doing that; but after about fifteen minutes the ‘patient’ sat up and declared that he had been spaced out, totally relaxed; like having eight hours good sleep!

I was impressed! I read a book on ‘Polarity’ and started to do balances on my children, friends and anyone who would lie still for me. Later, I meet someone who had studied at the Polarity institite, in America. He told me, "What you’re doing is only a part of Polarity, called ‘Chakra Balancing’." So, I began doing chakra balancing, instead, although I was very hazy as to what a chakra was!

I heard an interview with a medical specialist from L.A. being asked if he would ever recommend a patient to an alternative therapy. "Yes," he said, "Polarity!"
The amazed interviewer asked why. The doctor replied, "Because I’ve seen the miracles it can produce!" I, personally, can relate to that.

After a successful demo, one Christmas day, I was folding up my table, when a cheeky kid came up and in a sneering voice said, "I don’t think much of your Polarity, mister. It’s just an excuse for giving love!"

That blew me away! I knew that the Lord, Himself had sent me a message, via an angel with a dirty face, but, what was I supposed to do about it? I had been brought up in a church where they talked about love but weren’t very demonstrative about ‘giving love’. I backed off for nearly a year, thinking, "No way can I do that!" But I knew that kid had been right!

Then I read Gerald Jampolsky’s book, Teach Only Love. In it he points out that you can teach your children either love or fear. If you are hitting them or emotionally abusing them you are teaching them fear. But, I wondered, "How does one DO love, beyond thinking or talking about it?"
So, seeing as I wasn’t being very bright, the Lord sent another messenger, my son. I arrived home to find him about to attack his sister with a big plastic hose.

I stepped, quickly, into the eye of that storm; shot him into the bathroom and sat against the door to separate them. He cowled under the basin, expecting a hiding.; she banged on the door shouting, "Hit him Dad; you saw what he was going to do!"

"Teach love." that good book had said. But how? I tried to say, "I love you, son." but the words wouldn’t come. They stuck in my throat.
I thought of ‘Polarity’, the excuse for giving love. In that we balance the ENERGY of the loving Heart Center, without thoughts or words. Was it possible that that energy could be sent to another person to let them know that they were loved?

I sent Heart-love to my son. It didn’t work, but I knew, intuitively, that I had come upon one of Life’s great secrets. My daughter was still banging on the door. I had been very close to her all her life and now I turned the Heart-love back to her. After about ten seconds, she stopped shouting and went down to the TV room.

With that little practise, I felt more confident. I thought, "We need to let go of our third chakra love of power and practise our heart-centred power of love."

I raised the power of my love and sent it out to my son. He came, slowly, out, leaned over the bath and pushed the hose onto the cold tap. I was sure I was going to get squirted and my love faltered. "If you’re so silly as to keep sitting there, I’m not going to be wasting my time; I’m going to have a bath."

Within five minutes I had resolved a conflict, with one watching TV and the other blowing bubbles in the bath! All without blows, threats or force. "Great!" The ‘excuse’ had become a technique. Now, I knew how to do it but how do I teach it?

Everyone has that high vibration that we call ‘love’ in their Heart Center. It isn’t difficult to attune to it by concentrating on it. Some may realise it as an emotion, a feeling, while other will feel it as a warmth or perceive it as a light. Then it can be expanded and directed.

Difficulty may arise in sending and directing it, as we, humans have long been taught to be very conservative in giving out love. This is where practise is needed. The more we practise giving love the more satisfying it is and the more it blesses both the one who gives and the one who takes. Inhibitions soon fall away, as they are of the conditional mind and not associated with heart-centred love.

The Mind (head stuff) loves to make associations, which then become conditions. That’s just what it does! Mind delights in raking over the past and finding old connections and ‘reasons why’, then turning these into conditions, with which to monitor and inhibit present time activities, especially ‘dangerous’ ones, like extending real love. Mind says, "I’ll love you, if...."

One often hears complaints that unconditional love is hard to do and keep up; yet it is the most powerful and natural, God-given ability of a human.

"How can I love my kids when they are so naughty ?" "How can I love my spouse, when we have constant arguments?" Ideas like these are from the conditioned mind. "I could love them if they’d only behave!" That’s an excuse for not giving real love. That’s setting up a ‘return wanted’. A bargaining chip!

Children who experience real love have few behavioural problems and spouses who are warmed by real love soon forget all those conditions that have caused disruptions.
Keep aware that we are dealing with energy. At this time of evolution we are learning to use and direct energy, as we once had to learn to utilise matter.

When someone receives the energy of unconditional love, they react, usually with a body movement or relaxation. That is how you can tell if you are getting your love across.

Non-forgiveness can be a barrier to giving love. If you hold resentment towards someone you will find it difficult to extend love to them. If you are demanding and unforgiving towards yourself, you will find your real love locked up and you will believe that love is just a condition of your mind.

Love is the highest vibration in the Universe. Since God is love to love is to be Godlike. As his teacher once instructed Jonathan Livingstone Seagull, let’s "Keep working on love."

If we are embodied on this planet to learn lessons, this must be the most important and satisfying lesson of all.